# 36 Our Own Traditions

Back in Ajigasawa – Elisha with the Rooster Cake

To be truthful, although we attended a Good Friday service – a very special joint service for Japanese churches in Toronto – it somehow didn’t feel very much like Good Friday.

We met so many people from our past – even some we hadn’t met in 30 + years! And, of course, we made new friends. But I missed our own traditions!

Back in Ajigasawa it was, Mary reports,  the ‘Smallest group we ever had, but was good.”

I missed the Last Supper meal of unleavened bread and lamb that speaks of salvation and deliverance.

And I missed the rooster cake that reminds us of Simon Peter and how Jesus prays for us:

But I have prayed for you, Simon, that your faith may not fail. And when you have turned back, strengthen your brothers."( Luke 22:32)

Our Saviour cares for us in our weakness!

I missed our own rich traditions… but I was deeply encouraged to see Daughter # 3 carrying on. Next year…

# 35 “Little House” books

Husband and Daughter # 4 arrived in Toronto Thursday evening. The girls immediately put on the “Little House” outfits Auntie Sarah had made for them (at their request) and we all walked down to Tim Horton’s for late night coffee (adults) and donuts (kids).

Now coffee and donuts at the edge of Chinatown at nine o’clock at night is not a very “Little House” activity. But watching them in their little aprons and bonnets I realized just how those books have enriched us.

Their father reads them a couple of chapters every night – just as his father read every night. Right now they are reading “By the Shores of Silver Lake” and I remember what is coming next… “The Long Winter.”

We had our own long winters in those early days in Japan. The “Little House” books were not written as Christian books and yet, when I think of the things we learned from them, I think of that word in Paul’s letter to the church at Rome:

For everything that was written in the past was written to teach us, so that through the endurance taught in the Scriptures and the encouragement they provide we might have hope. (Rom 15:4)

Because these books did teach us endurance, and give us encouragement and hope. Treasures...

# 34 BEAUTIFUL MUSIC

Sunday night Grand Daughter # 1 and I went to a concert at Knox Church. It was not an unmitigated pleasure. The benches were painfully hard and since Grand Daughter was ready to go home after the first 10 minutes – her powers of music appreciation are only just developing! – I was glad we sat in the balcony.

Away from observation I was less conscious of her wiggling and could instead, contemplate the beautiful words of Carl Heinreich Graun’s “The Death of Jesus.”

7. ARIA

Lord, I pray You, give me power,
so that in temptation's hour,
full obedience I would give,
for my Saviour i would live.
On your mercy I am casting
all my fallen self for grace.

You whose death was in my place, 
Christ, my Lord, the everlasting,
Christ, my life, my joy unending,
all my hope on You depending,
Move me Lord to sing Your praise,
and sustain me all my days.

But the MOST BEAUTIFUL part of the service was our congregational response at the end after the cantata was finished. We all sang together the hymn Here is Love, Vast as the Ocean.

With the stringed instruments and the choir’s descant soaring above our conjoined voices it was perhaps a glimpse of heaven.

In Toronto these musical opportunities may be expected but even though most of my life has been lived “out in the sticks”, looking back, I see that I have at every point been blessed with access to good music.

From my earliest childhood in rural Connecticut, through our college years on the Canadian prairie, and then our long sojourn in rural Japan I have enjoyed a rich musical heritage. I am so very blessed.

# 33 Auld Acquaintances

With Naomi at 2003 KGK Spring Retreat

Today my son’s family hosted the monthly Group Bible Study for Grace Toronto Japanese Church. I knew that I had previously met Naomi (above) through KGK, but today after supper we looked at old photos and reminisced.

It turned out that her first KGK camp experience (in 2002) was also my first. And in 2004 she was in the workshop on marriage that my husband and I led. Nearly eight years later she can still tell me what we talked about! She said that even though she had grown up in church it was the first time she had ever heard these things.

Since the reason I’m counting blessings is to counteract the sudden attack of “Has it been worth it?” blues I experienced late this winter, today’s conversation with Naomi was just what I needed.

…whoever refreshes others will be refreshed.

-  Proverbs 11:25

# 32 Chesterton, St. Paul …. & a Vision of Christ

“And when it rains on your parade, look up rather than look down. Without the rain, there would be no rainbow.”

― G.K. Chesterton

I saw this on Facebook yesterday and I wondered which of his books its from because today I felt the need of a little Chestertonian perspective on life! After Googling it I’m still wondering. Apparently its one of those things everyone likes to quote – with no context.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m having a perfectly lovely time here… but the bum knee, no car and uncertainty about when son and family will be able to return to Japan somehow all closed in on me today.

At Morning Prayers the New Testament reading was 2 Corinthians 4. A few tears rolled down my cheeks as I heard the words:

“Therefore, since through God's mercy we have this ministry, we do not lose heart… We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. “

We do not lose heart!

Tonight at Evening Prayers we sang my husband’s favorite hymn, Be Thou My Vision.

Yes, we are only jars of clay, BUT we hold a great treasure:  “the light of the knowledge of God's glory displayed in the face of Christ.”

# 31 (Anglican) Liturgy

For many years the OMF Mission Home in Toronto was flanked by St. James-Bond Church on the right and St. Margaret’s Anglican Church a few doors down on the left. The James Bond connection struck us immediately. But it was St. Margaret’s that fascinated me – they had Matins and Vespers.

OMF Mission Home at 1058 Avenue Road (in 2003)

St. James Bond Church was torn down several yeas ago to make room for a large seniors complex and they’ve just torn down St. Margaret’s. I never did make to either the Matins or Vespers there.

But this month I finally got my chance. I’ve attended Morning and Evening Prayers in the Wycliffe Chapel nearly every day since I arrived.

The services are short – not even half an hour - but so RICH. Usually both an Old Testament reading, and a New Testament reading, always a Psalm or two. Sometimes a hymn and/or a short message. The prayers range far and wide - across subjects I know I should pray for and never do and then there are pauses for us to add our own concerns.

I really love the liturgy. I know that unthinking habit can be deadening, but I’m not generally an unthinking person. And to be truthful, I find thoughtful habits are so freeing. Form is freeing… in art, in dance,…and in prayer!

For instance, I usually repent when my sins bring everything down around my ears, but that daily housecleaning is more likely to happen with a little help.

The officiate says: “Let us confess our sins against God and our neighbor.” (Or a similar word.) And then a silence is kept for us to briefly reflect before we pray together:

Most merciful God,
we confess that we have sinned against you
in thought, word, and deed,
by what we have done,
and by what we have left undone.
We have not loved you with our whole heart;
we have not loved our neighbors as ourselves.
We are truly sorry and we humbly repent,
for the sake of your Son Jesus Christ,
have mercy on us and forgive us;
that we may delight in your will,
and walk in your ways,
to the glory of your Name. Amen.

I love this prayer. It covers all the bases that I tend to skid past without touching them as I should.

This month the Anglican liturgy has enriched my life so much that when I get back to Ajigasawa I may just pull out that little Book of Common Prayer that has sat on my shelf for so long and start using it. (But I shall miss the corporate experience!)

# 30 Bright Eyes

Josiah is another popular little fellow. I think because he’s little and cuddly.

But he is also waking up to the world.

When I first arrived he was still nearly newborn. But now he wants to “talk”. Last night he woke up while Yuko was enjoying a night out and “talked” to me for nearly two hours.

I love the way he looks and looks just waiting to catch my eye and when he sees me watching him he starts in.

It kind of reminds me of the verse:

As the eyes of slaves look to the hand of their master, as the eyes of a female slave look to the hand of her mistress, so our eyes look to the LORD our God, till he shows us his mercy.

- Psalm 123:2

Actually maybe its more like this verse:

I wait for the LORD, my whole being waits, and in his word I put my hope. 

- Psalm 130:5

This kind of loving connection with the infants and children in my life has been enriching beyond words.

# 29 My little sweet little buddy

With his big smile and cheerful disposition, Judah is everyone’s sweetheart. But he’s “my little buddy.”

He had to give up the crib to his little brother but he’s too much mischief and  way, way too much distraction when his sisters are supposed to be going to sleep so he’s been sleeping in my room.

During the day we read books together and go on expeditions. He’s also my regular companion at morning and evening prayers in Wycliffe Chapel and he’s quite good for a not quite-two-year old!

His parents named him Judah in honour of the line and tribe of Christ, who is the "Lion of the tribe of Judah with special reference to the prophetic passage of Genesis 49:8-12, especially v.10 which reads:
“The scepter will not depart from Judah,
nor the ruler’s staff from between his feet,
until he to whom it belongs [ie. "Shiloh"] shall come
and the obedience of the nations shall be his.”

I always call him Judah but I love the meaning of his Japanese name "Motoi" (基) . It is the kanji character meaning "foundation." It is also one of the two characters used to read "Christ" (基督). His parents say they had in mind the hymn "The Church's One Foundation."

He’s such a sweet little fellow and a blessing to all of us. But I’m especially blessed by the fact that he’s such a willing partner at Morning and Evening Prayers!

# 28 Good books

Sharing the honey of life

You can’t one day decide to know your (grand) children and have it magically happen. You begin from the beginning by sharing “the honey” of life, as well as providing “the milk.” Knowing someone means sharing ideas, growing together. It means not being embarrassed about feelings or being yourself. As a small boy, our son frequently commented, “I like him. He treats me like I’m a people.” It became a family saying; being treated like “a people” means being taken seriously and being liked for who you really are. Interpersonal relationships within a family develop on this level.   - Gladys Hunt

# 27 Children’s Children

This morning there was a baby shower for grandson Josiah Elliot and another little fellow born about the same time. The older little ones played nearby in the foyer while we adults chatted with one another in the Reading Room. Good food, good fellowship and then prayers for the wee babes.

I wonder how many times in the course of the morning I was called on to explain that I now have 9 grandchildren under the age of 6?

To tell the truth, it took me a while to cotton on to grand mothering…  I loved mothering! But it was a bit rough at first being relegated to the cheering squad. Its growing on me now.

I’ve always loved the Proverb:

Children's children are a crown to the aged,
and parents are the pride of their children.

^{- Proverbs 17:6}

I don’t feel very aged just yet… but today I could relate to the concept of grandchildren as a crown. I love watching my own children parent – they are such good parents!  Time spent with their families enriches my life.

# 26 Stories of grace

Our son, heavily influenced by Martin Luther’s Bondage of the Will and later Reformation theology, named his eldest daughter Grace.

When she was small we used to sing all “the grace hymns” to her … Marvelous Grace, etc. There are a lot of hymns about God’s grace but I suppose most everyone’s favorite is Amazing Grace.

I love the third verse:

Through many dangers, toils and snares,
I have already come;
’Tis grace hath brought me safe thus far,
And grace will lead me home.

Hebrews 11 tells us of some amazing people who endured great “dangers, toils and snares.”  And then chapter 12 begins:

“Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith.”

Ever since I was a little girl (like Grace) I have loved to listen to the stories of those who have gone before me. Their stories are rich with wisdom and encouragement.

# 25 All things Chinese

Yesterday we went on an expedition. I’d forgotten about expeditions with small children. We took the kids to Chinatown for Bubble Tea this afternoon. It was A MAJOR undertaking ...and they didn't like bubble tea!

We had fun anyway. It just meant changing my expectations – and drinking A LOT of Bubble Tea!

I’ve had a fascination for things Chinese ever since I can remember. Perhaps it began with my mother’s penchant for Chinese Restaurants – we always brought the chopsticks home.

I still love Chinese food (and Bubble Tea!)  But my Chinese heritage is much, much richer…

There are the people I never met but who were key in forming my ideals as a teen…  Hudson Taylor, Isobel Kuhn, Watchman Nee (although I don’t know what I’d think of him now), my heroines “the China Trio”.

CIM (China Inland Mission) missionaries continued to figure highly in my life as I entered adulthood…  “the China Hands” at the OMF Prayer Meetings (all elderly but still so amazing), David Michell of A Boy’s War, … this list could be very long.

There’s much more…. the language (now that’s rich!) which I’ve been studying for four years now, the CIM/OMF archives with the artifacts, old books  and “China Millions” magazines.

It’s a rich, rich heritage of faith and beauty.

# 24 All creatures great and small

I took the kids to the Trinity campus again today and let them run. Judah loves the birds and squirrels. His pronunciation lacks clarity but his vocabulary now includes the word squirrel. And he announces each squirrel or bird he sees. (And then he toddles after them.)

I love the squirrels, too, with their soft, fluffy tails. We don’t often see squirrels  in Japan. I think I’ve only seen 2 in 33 years! 

And I love the birds. The city is full of birds… sparrows, of course! And robins, starlings, red-winged blackbirds (this surprised me!) and once in awhile a red cardinal. Sometimes I stop, blot all the city noises, and just listen to them singing.

It reminds me that I am worth more than a sparrow to the God whose eye is on the sparrows.

And the hymns start bubbling up… All things bright and beautiful (though I still can’t sing it properly), All Creatures of our God and King, and the one I really want to belt out I Sing the Mighty Power of God:

There’s not a plant or flower below,
But makes Thy glories known,
And clouds arise, and tempests blow,
By order from Thy throne;
While all that borrows life from Thee
Is ever in Thy care;
And everywhere that we can be,
Thou, God art present there.

# 23 Sunshine and morning light

Yesterday the long awaited tea party was a success in its own way. I’d forgotten the rule for children – the thing they want so much will seldom satisfy them. The unexpected moment gives the most delight.

So I rather think oldest granddaughter actually enjoyed the hour dancing about Trinity campus in the sunshine in her pretty party dress more than the actual party. But the party was fun, too.

Tea Party Wycliffe

We have been blessed by sunny day after sunny day and yesterday morning I took the two middle children for a walk around the (city) block in the early morning sunshine. It was SO BEAUTIFUL It took me awhile but I finally remembered all the words to Eleanor Farjeon’s lovely morning hymn.

Morning has broken, like the first morning
Blackbird has spoken, like the first bird
Praise for the singing, praise for the morning
Praise for the springing fresh from the word

Sweet the rain's new fall, sunlit from heaven
Like the first dewfall, on the first grass
Praise for the sweetness of the wet garden
Sprung in completeness where his feet pass

Mine is the sunlight, mine is the morning
Born of the one light, Eden saw play
Praise with elation, praise every morning
God's recreation of the new day

I really feel when I sing it, “Mine is the sunlight, mine is the morning…    Praise with elation, praise every morning.”  I’m rich, so very rich.

# 22 Tea Parties

Tomorrow we’re having a tea party. The girls are all excited. I don’t know if Grace remembers the tea parties we had together in Japan but she’s been reading Annie and Snowball and the Tea Cup Club.  And she has some high expectations!

March 2009 in Kazamaura

My sister and I started the family tea party tradition years ago in order to teach our children manners. I don’t know as though it was effective for that purpose. But the kids loved it and it satisfies my craving for beauty.

Tea and Sympathy

And perhaps I was spurred on by Edith Schaeffer’s books Hidden Art and What is a Family – two books well worth reading!

A pause in the busy-ness, a pretty table, a little feast with friends ….  Tea parties are part of the richness of my life.

# 21 Heartfelt advice

Perfume and incense bring joy to the heart, and the pleasantness of a friend springs from their heartfelt advice.  _{Proverbs 27:9}

2003 Aomori Christian Center – Church Retreat

Yesterday an old friend  for two years a neighbor in Ajigasawa) dropped by for a visit. Our conversation ranged far and wide but it also went deep at times.

Today was Sunday. I love Sundays for many reasons but one reason is the encouragement we give and receive on Sunday as we meet together.

And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another--and all the more as you see the Day approaching. _{Hebrews 10:24, 25}

# 20 The Old Ocean Hymns

My husband often talks about the importance of water travel in the 1800s and how it is reflected in the hymnody. (And wonders what happened to trains, planes and cars … why aren’t these modes of transportation reflected in modern hymnody?)

As for me, I love the “ocean hymns.” A few of my favorites are Jesus, Saviour, Pilot Me,  We Have An Anchor which I used to sing with my brother while we washed the dishes, and  O The Deep, Deep Love of Jesus – which I love because the tune rolls like the ocean waves!

Now in the Wycliffe Chapel I’m learning a “new” (really its rather old) ocean hymn I Feel the Winds of God Today:

I feel the winds of God today;
today my sail I lift,
Though heavy, oft with drenching spray,
and torn with many a rift;
If hope but light the water’s crest,
and Christ my bark will use,
I’ll seek the seas at His behest,
and brave another cruise.

It is the wind of God  
that dries my vain regretful tears,
Until with braver thoughts shall rise
the purer, brighter years;
If cast on shores of selfish ease
or pleasure I should be;
Lord, let me feel Thy freshening breeze,
and I’ll put back to sea.

If ever I forget Thy love 
and how that love was shown,
Lift high the blood red flag above;
it bears Thy name alone.
Great pilot of my onward way,
Thou wilt not let me drift;
I feel the winds of God today,
today my sail I lift.

I love that last bit of the first stanza:

If hope but light the water’s crest,
and Christ my bark will use,
I’ll seek the seas at His behest,
and brave another cruise.

It reminds me of Psalm 18:28 “You, LORD, keep my lamp burning; my God turns my darkness into light.”

I often feel the way is rather dark and then God turns that darkness into light … and I can “brave another cruise.”

# 19 My Heavenly Citizenship

I started reading Rumer Godden’s The Greengage Summer this evening and this paragraph caught my attention.

“We were odd, belonging and not belonging, and odd is an uncomfortable thing to be; we did not want to belong but were humiliated that we did not.”

As foreigners in Japan we know this feeling. But to be honest, I knew it long before. Even as a child my faith set me apart.

Peter says we are “a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God's special possession” but the other side of this truth is that in this world we are “foreigners and exiles.”

When my children struggled with identity issues (their father was Canadian, their mother was American and everyone else was Japanese) I used to tell them that they were “Tengokujin” because as the Apostle Paul wrote, “Our citizenship is in heaven.”

恵美里 (Emily)

Our granddaughter Emily’s name reflects this. The first two characters are grace and beautiful but the third character is city. Hebrews 11 says Abraham “made his home in the promised land like a stranger in a foreign country… For he was looking forward to the city with foundations, whose architect and builder is God.”

And why is this sense of foreignness a blessing?!

Because it helps me (and my family) to do right even when all the world is doing wrong. And this is blessing indeed!

# 18 The McAllister Prayer

Today as I was leaving the Refectory I paused for a moment to speak Dr. Taylor’s wife.

Dr. Glen Taylor with Josiah Elliot

Dr. Taylor’s mother was an Elliot from the famous McAllister-Elliot connection.

Four of the McAllisters’ thirteen children married four of the Elliots’ eight children producing 60 double cousins. (So the martyr Jim Elliot’s father was my husband’s grandfather’s double cousin.)

Saved in middle life, the McAllisters took Psalm 78 very seriously:

       … we will tell the next generation the praiseworthy deeds of the LORD, his power, and the wonders he has done.

He decreed statutes for Jacob and established the law in Israel, which he commanded our ancestors to teach their children, so the next generation would know them, even the children yet to be born, and they in turn would tell their children. Then they would put their trust in God and would not forget his deeds but would keep his commands.

Their prayer was that “the children yet to be born” would in turn tell their children about God and his praiseworthy deeds.

# 17 OMF Prayer Meetings

Tonight we attended the monthly OMF prayer meeting on Avenue Road. What a flood of memories as I walked in with the son I had carried there in my arms so many years ago. This time he carried his own son in his arms!

But what warmed my heart the most was the greeting, “Have you got a car? We’ve been praying for a car.” 

We don’t have a car yet. And to be truthful I’ve been really discouraged. Our son, his wife and four children have no car just now – and believe me, anyone trying to do deputation in Canada needs a car. In fact, anyone with with four children needs a car!  But how can I pray for a 6 seater for them AND a seven seater (our oldest daughter is coming from Japan with her family) for us ?!  How can I pray for something this big?!  But our senior colleagues cheerful greetings reminded me:

Ebenezer…     "Thus far the LORD has helped us."

Jehovah Jireh…  “The LORD will provide.”